4 Things Women Want to Hear
By Jennifer Benjaminhttp://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/articlecosmomatch.aspx?cp-documentid=9983521>1=32023
Remember when your dad taught you how to ride a bike? Sure, it may be a silly, sentimental story to you, but chicks eat that stuff up. “Women tend to be analytical about their own childhood, so if you give your girl a glimpse into your upbringing, she gets a fuller picture of who you are,” says Linda Olson, PhD, a clinical psychologist and relationship expert. Sharing something as simple as a summer-camp tale or your obsession with baseball cards will be enough to quench her curiosity.
Unless you’re on a top-secret mission, you’re probably cool about discussing your job. So tell her when you’ve had a good day and why, what some of your frustrations are, and where you’d like to end up careerwise. “Men often define themselves by what they do for a living, and by talking about it, you’re showing her a side of your personality that she may not normally get to see,” says James Sniechowski, PhD, a relationship therapist and coauthor of The Smart Couple’s Guide to the Wedding of Your Dreams.
Why You’re Into Her
You may have already told her that she’s cute or she rocks your world in bed, but your girlfriend wants sweet specifics. “She needs to feel that you value her and see her for who she really is,” says Olson. “To reinforce that, compliment her on the less obvious things she does that appeal to you so much.” No, that doesn’t mean you have to recite a laundry list of love-you stuff. Just focus on key qualities like the way she laughs or how well she treats her friends.
You may not have a five-year plan, but chances are, you’ve thought about where you’d like to be down the road. Do you want to start your own business? Have a getaway cabin in the mountains? If you’ve given it any thought at all — and you’re far enough along in your relationship that it would be cool to discuss it — she’s going to want to hear about it. “When you share your long-term goals and dreams, she not only sees what kind of man you are when you strip away your typical day-to-day exterior, but she also gets a clue as to how compatible you’ll be long term,” says Sniechowski.